I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
