Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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