So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
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