do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
