I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
