windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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