dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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