all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You can't motorboat a personality
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
