I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize