so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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