I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I would ride that face into the sunset
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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