just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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