Can Purell be used as lube?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
