Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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