Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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