are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
