i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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