How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
