So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize