Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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