Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
