Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
