So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
