No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
