I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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