need another drink. this is the easiest way
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
