Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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