What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You were trust falling into bushes
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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