Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
