wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
