I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
