I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
