that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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