literally had 100 drinks last night.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
