Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
