New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Is it penis luge time yet?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I think pants incapable of making pants work
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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