Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
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