you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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