there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
