Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
