she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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