PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
