So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
We smell like vodka and hangover
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
