So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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