i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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