This girl is more easily done than said...
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
