the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
