Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize