Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
