3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
