he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
